March 18, 2009

30 Ways to know you're Irish

What it Means to Be Irish

1) You will never play professional basketball.

2) You swear very well.

3) At least one of your cousins is a fireman, cop, bar owner, funeral
home owner or holds political office. And you have at least one aunt who is
a nun, or uncle who's a priest.

4) You think you sing very well.

5) You have no idea how to make a long story short!

6) There isn't a big difference between you losing your temper or
killing someone.

7) Much of your childhood meals were boiled. Instant potatoes were a
mortal sin.

8) You have never hit your head on a ceiling.

9) You spent a good portion of your childhood kneeling in prayer
(Catholic guilt forever!).

10) You're strangely poetic after a few beers.

11) You are, therefore, poetic a lot.

12) You will be punched for no good reason...a lot.

13) Some punches directed at you are from legacies of past
generations.

14) Many of your sisters and/or cousins are named Mary, Catherine, or
Eileen... and there is at least one member of your family with the
full name of Mary Catherine Eileen.

15) Someone in your family is very generous. It is more than likely
you.

16) You may not know the words, but that doesn't stop you from
singing.

17) You can't wait for the other guy to stop talking before you start
talking.

18) You're not nearly as funny as you think you are ... but what you
lack in talent, you make up for in frequency.

19) There wasn't a huge difference between your last wake and your
last keg party.

20) You are, or know someone, named Murph.

21) If you don't know Murph then you know Mac. If you don't know Murph
or Mac then you know Sully. It's conceivable you know Sully MacMurphy.

22) You are genetically incapable of keeping a secret.

23) You have Irish Alzheimer's... you forget everything but the
grudges!

24) You met your husband/wife/significant
other/accountant/lawyer/landscaper/etc.. in a bar.

25) All of your losses are alcohol-related (loss of... virginity,
driver's license, money, job, significant other, teeth from punch...) but this
never stops you from drinking.

26) Your skin's ability to tan.... not so much.

27) At this very moment, you have at least two relatives who are not
speaking to each other (not fighting, mind you, just not speaking to
each other).

28) Childhood remedies for the common cold often included whiskey.

29) There's no leaving a family party without saying goodbye for at
least 45 minutes.

30) You long ago learnt that 'Irish Stew' is a euphemism for 'boiled
leftovers.'

March 16, 2009

And another thing...

- I'm getting a little nervous with all the coverage of Brady & Giselle... reminds me of The Natural when Roy Hobbs' game flags as he kanoodles with Kim Basinger (poor Hobbs - he had no luck with the fairer sex - one shoots him and one gets him in The Slump). I'm sure Brady is rehabbing to the utmost, but I just get a feeling that at the exact moment he needs to focus & concentrate on regaining his game, he's not. If this were a movie, I'd just have to say most of the audience would be expecting a large downfall this season. Of course, life is never like the movies...

- There is no way I see the Tampa Bay Rays coming close to what they did last year. Hey, they are chock full of talent, but last year, it all came together -- I think that was a star-crossing rather than a permanent alignment -- I'm calling for the Kansas City Royals to have a better end of season record.

- Red Sox have the best 1-7 hitters in the game, as long at Pedey makes it back unscathed from the WBC.

- WBC will be moved or eliminated by 2012 -- I think we'll see MLB player antipathy rachet up next year and even more the following year. I'm pretty sure the U.S. is the most imporatant demo in this exhibityion contest and NOBODY CARES.

- AIG execs getting mega-bonuses for retention. Retention? Shouldn't a retention bonus be predicated on a performance bonus? I.e., if you perform well & get a bonus, they sure as heck want to retain your services, but if you don't qualify for a bonus per your performance, why would a company want to retain you by virtue of paying you more money? We needed Toto to pull back the curtain earlier, since learning about all the financial goings-ons at these companies is akin to watching them all line up at the slot machines with our bail-out/stimulous money.

- Of the U.S. Big Three, Ford seems to be on the right track -- it's not asking for more money from the government, it has a deal with the unions, it trimming down and focusing on what will make them money. I don't want anyone to lose their jobs, but it sure would be nice to have one U.S. automaker -- U.S. citizens who want to support the American economy could go to one company for their auto needs, thereby not dilluting the purchases, and the american carmaker wouls look to innovators like Toyota & Honda as the direct competition and actually start acting, instead of merely reacting.

- Its taken awhile, but I no know what kind of sports talk radio I like: I like a lot of facts (including ocassional irrelevant factoids for fun), a little attitude, and a lot of callers from which a least one relevant point is fished for by the hosts.

March 2, 2009

The good & bad of talk radio

As a moderate Democrat, I hafta say, I love tuning in to Rush Limbaugh every day. Listening to him and his listeners talk is like reading Lewis Carroll - a mix-mash of words that are so implausible or made up they are hilarious! I could listen to this guy all day, because I know he knows that things such as true-socialism is not even a remote possibility.

And the people who throw around the terms Socialism and Communism are latching on to and giving preference to traditional fear-words over trying to understand. This economical melt-down doesn't have a singular demon, as 9/11 did, but make no mistake, it's in every way as serious. This country lined up behind Bush and gave him the benefit of the doubt for over four years. Heck, I'd be content with letting the Obama get two years -- he is surrounding himself with economic advisers who are both beyond reproach and have been tried and true during the U.S.'s great economic times. United we stand divided we fall doesn't have to just steeling ourself against seen enemies -- how about teaming up in the bad times as well?

Economy-wise, these are near-disastrous times -- guess what? The country elected Obama as our President. The President is employing the platform of his party, as well as all the ideas he said he stood for. Overtly and in full view, may I add. Ummm... where's the mystery, other than thje mystery in the fact that some people actually expected the Dow to go up (?) within his first 100 days?!... this tide has been ebbing for too long and it is a full moon. It'll turn, just maybe not the way you want it to, but it will turn.

This country will forever go back and forth -- I count on it. I'm not crazy enough to think my idealogy has all the right answers, just what I perceive as more of them. I'll always want GOPers in the mix -- I like some of their ideas a lot. I want both parties forever together to keep things balanced.

So anyway, Rush is funny because he's a zealot who, if he spoke in anapestic tetrameter, may give Dr. Seuss a run for his money in the ways of whimsy.